Don't look to your peers for feedback on the job you are doing as a parent, look at your children. Are they happy? Are their needs being met? Do they treat others kindly? Do they have friends? Are they doing well in school or do they need some help there? Do they love you? Do they want to be around you or do they avoid you?
If you are doing a good job as a parent, you'll know it.
Proud mom of two,
P.S. If other's comments towards you bother you, consider calling them out on it - "Are you shaming me for having a clean house?"